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Sunday, May 2, 2010

A Very Different Outlook

This evening I was bathing my children and suddenly a warm feeling came over me. No it was not Luke tinkling in the tub (like he is fond of doing) again. I just suddenly had that feeling of being the luckiest person in the whole world. Sometimes I have to pinch myself that these 3 amazing blessings are really mine. Sometimes I just can't even believe it. One week from today is Mother's Day 2010. It will be quite a different experience for me from last year's Mother's Day. I was dreading the day. I really didn't want any part of it, not even to celebrate with my own mother. I was still grieving the loss of my little girl Leyna. We had just been through another IVF cycle that had failed. I was sad, hurt, angry, and at about my lowest point. I didn't want to think about other mothers out there enjoying their day. But this year I get to spend the day with all the people I love the most including my Sarah-bear, my Jakers, and my monkey man Luke. Thank you God for these blessings you have bestowed on me. It makes me sad to think of the mothers out there grieving the loss of a child. I hope you are able to find some peace on this day. We've come along way in the past year. And I cannot wait to see what the next 12 months will bring.

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